Vocation Story of Sr. Laarni of the Immaculate Heart of Mary Bongato, RGS
Since I was in high school, I already had this desire to become a nun and like a seed it grew in my heart.
Year 1992 – I was in third year college when God touched my life – my mother died because of cancer. I was depressed and lonely, it was deep and painful experience that I felt something within me died also. It took years before I was able to transcend my feelings, my desire to follow Jesus has strengthened me to face the difficulties and trials in life.
After I finished college, I worked as an export clerk in Pasig City for almost two years but I was not happy with it. I felt empty deep inside. It was then that I began to search for the true happiness, seeking God’s will for me. I went through several search-ins to the different congregations and I was attracted to apply to the Camillian Sisters. But after a year my heart longs / desires for contemplative life. I want to dedicate myself in the service of God through prayer, to work and live my life in silence and solitude. I sought advice from our parish priest, Fr. Butch Butawan and he introduced the Contemplative Sisters of the Good Shepherd in Ampayon, Butuan City. I got interested so I went personally to the monastery last December 16, 1996 and I met Sr. Ellen, a contemplative sister. During my stay-in experience I can say that I finally found the congregation I wanted to join. I prayed and asked God’s help to guide me in my journey.
The moment I asked permission from my father he stared at me, then in a low voice he said, “If that will make you happy I sill support you” I’m glad that my family has supported me which has helped me in times of difficulties and crises I’ve met along the way. I treasured more my pre-novitiate days, my “bandmates” is part of God’s blessing, with love and affection we have supported and encouraged one another.
God’s call is really a mystery and everything is a grace. I realized how small and naked I am in the eyes of God. Reflecting my personal experience of the mercy of our Shepherd God, I’ll admit my sinfulness, brokenness and woundedness, behind these I was able to appreciate that I am precious in the eyes of God. Gradually, I was being transformed, in the process God is purifying me.
I pronounced my First Vows in November 11, 2000. With heart full of gladness and joy, I thank God for the gift of my contemplative vocation. It was on the 11th of November, 1825 that the first Magdalens were founded in Tours (and so I told myself, “You are a new foundation of the 3rd millennium”).
Now, I have experienced inner joy and peace despite all the sufferings and struggles I have encountered. Community living is very demanding. But for the love Jesus, I have to die to myself and love the cross. I am grateful for my experiences that helped me grow emotionally and spiritually.
In the midst of my struggles, confusion, hurt and self-doubts I recall my First Profession to remind me of God’s fidelity and I have to exert quality effort to be faithful in my journey. Hopefully I can be of help to those who are in need of my prayers and sacrifices, especially to those who are served by our Congregation.
